GYSO Reviews Part 13 - Avocados
Published: 2023-05-07
Is it a fruit gyso post? Is a it a vegetable? Today we review the millennial joke food why you should never forget your gyso lore.
like never
The Good
Tim:
The best thing about 🥑🥑🥑🥑 avocados
is that they are great for stabbing with a knife. You really gotta risk your fingers penis lol, lmao even just to get that damn seed out, and that adrenaline pumping action is what keeps tired soccer moms from going postal. Gotta get your kicks somehow.
So thank you, avocados
, for saving the regional soccer match between the little children who just chase butterflies in the field. They’ll get a trophy anyways, but your trophy is green, so it’s cool. honestly I don’t really care lmao give me bean bags
THOR: TIM; it looks like this GYSO post has been vandalized. I found it laying around, it was one we did to trial the Reviews format…
One of my best friends is an ~~avocado~~ **freshavacado**
. Or, well, it’s a picture of an avocado. But that’s because Avo died in The Great Soccer War of 1920 my ass, after one high-strung over-stressed mother
bleep blorp mother skunkers
found out that you could just push on the other side of an avocado to get the seed out without having to stab your hand.
BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD
THRONE FOR THE THRONE THRONE
I lie awake at night, thinking of what could have been, had the war not happened.
Thor:
THOR: Gosh, this seems to be a real mess. The Wikipedia page for vandalism says: The \ Vandals, an ancient Germanic people, are associated with senseless destruction as a result of their sack of Rome under King G3n53r1c in
455four hundred and forty five. During_the_Enlightenment,Rome_wasidealizedbuilt in a day,while_thebig_titty_Goths_andVSandals_were blamed for its destruction__. The Vandals may not have been any more destructive than other invaders of ancient times, but they did inspire English poetJohn Drydenbig Albert, master of dance to writewwwwwww, Till Goths, and Vandals, a rude Northern race, Did
STILL THOR LOL, LMAO EVEN: all the matchless Monuments deface (1694). However, the Vandals did intentionally damage statues, which may be why their name is associated with the vandalism of art. The term Vandalisme was coined in 1794 by Henri Grégoire,
bishop
of Blois, to describe the destruction of artwork following the FrenchRevolution
u spin me right round baby right round. The ter
m was quickly adopted across Europe. This new use of the term was important in colouring the perception of theVSandals from later Late Antiquity, po
pularizing the pre-existing idea that they were ab
ar
ba
ri
c group with a taste for destruction.
GYSO
GGWP
WHOMP WHOMP LUCK IS ON MY SIDE
- do laundry
- stupid
- < > follow formatting
You might not believe it, but when I had a girlfriend <I really don’t believe it> we would sometimes eat avocados. After The Unproportionally Sized Death following The Great Soccer War, having
:D | ||||
slaved away at the grave fields for days on end, the last avocado we had together was pushed onto her lifeless body as we threw it in one of the 6x6x6 pits that would house approximately thirteen bodies.
welcome to the
the jungle, we got poison
Honestly, you don’t know what this is, and we’re not going to tell you the green color is very green. Usually, unless it’s brown or sometimes a bit purple and grey.
Other than that I don’t see a very big use-case for avocados over it’s younger, more attractive cousin, the fig. Go figures.
The Bad this post lol U+1F4A9
Tim: 😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀👅👅👅👅👅
I know that people are supposed to like guacamole, and avocados, and all that jazz FREEFORM JAIZZ, but I can’t bring myself to to not like the taste.
I SUMMON THEE 🎅
Enjoy what you enjoy, brahhhhhh, but I’m not going to put that green
snot-pulp
in my mouth. It doesn't even taste like anything except this weird... earthy flavor? Like trying to say you like the taste of lettuce, but at least lettuce has a better texture.
My suggestion to improve ~~avocados~~**my shambling corpse of a life**
is to remove the nasty green shit thing everyone eats ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), replace it with chocolate ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), and replace the seed ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) with a fun toy ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). Change the skin to some nice plastic wrapping ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) and brand it as a ‘Kinder Surprise Egg’.🦑
I WAS HHERE MEEEE I 🥚 WAS
Thor:
If I had a piece of a penny every other time I had anything to eat, I don’t know if I ever would be able to afford avocados. I also think my teeth would hurt pretty bad.
When I asked Goopy Droopy, he said avocados smell like sand dunes and gasoline. GOD DAMMIT WHY ME?! (┛◉Д◉)┛彡┻━┻
:DDDDDDD🥐DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD | ||||
My first first! and foremostmast critique of the avocados is their branding. Are they an exclusive food for the older generation? Are they a hip food for the millennials? Are they a front for the international cocaine drug cartels? Or are they finally going to answer my DM on Insta please I’m so lonely? I asked you “wat up?” 👅 like four weeks ago and you left me on read. Sources tell me you’re ready to reply in “like, any minute”. Let me know in the comments if you think DIE I should send a picture of my flaccid snot mmmm, or my larger-than-average orange mmmm I bought at the grocery store the other day. 🗾
The Everything Else The Best Section
Tim:
One of my breast friends is a chicken.
Hiiii I’m tim I"m suck a loooser I can’t write brogs ever without being stupiddd
People inspect avocados GYSO?? we still do that?? for pbruises more carefully than they inspect their homes for bad electrical wiringbad joke try again. My
room’s wiring is really sbad, and sometimes it’ll just short out for no damn reason more news at 11, local blog writer doesn’t know I poisoned the cerial along with the the the the the other bedroom lmao in my literal mother’s basement. Nothing else has this problem in the house.
What I’m trying to say is the morals of people are impossible to understand you suk lolololo0 get on my level scrub, like how you could do this to me!!!!🥑!!!!!!! and you shouldn’t trust them when they try to make excuses for atrocities and/or sins morally justifiable in random blog posts. Why bring it up? No reason. Just telling you.
Thor:
When I was around siex or seven years old, I ate an avocado hamster unaware of their cost (about $9.99 at the local whole foods). it’s costing you this fucking blog right now, assfoot
I’m usually questioned about my moralse essentric personality traits, like eating hamsters. LIKE HOW YOU COULD DO THS TO ME??????🎅👅????????? But it’s not my choice to be committingentating astrocitiesturf. Right now I have been put in an avocado spot financially. Simply put, I need to eatset some ethics stuff aside in order to repenteat my sins. Santa Clause told me to, so that he’ll repay my debt.
big guy 🎅 do be kinda cool tho ┬──┬ ¯\\_(ツ)
The Conclusions
THE CONCLUSIONS
never
gonna
give
you
up
never
gonna
let
you
lmao
<blockquote><p>never</p>
<blockquote><p>gonna</p><blockquote><p>give</p>
<blockquote><p>you</p><blockquote><p>up</p>
<blockquote><p>never</p><blockquote><p>gonna</p>
<blockquote><p>let</p><blockquote><p>you</p>
<blockquote><p>lmao</p>
</blockquote></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote></blockquote>
Tim:
If I were two rank avocados in a tier 11 list of all things, they would be somewhere between the inflatable tubefetish-men you find at car lots, and 1920sz style pressure gauges. Although that’s being pretty sgenerous, since they have a lot of joke-potential with all the memes and shit. If they didn’t have that they’ve be a lot leaf **b*lower on the
list.
- the
- list
sav eme fr om hav ing t o r eadmor e of t hiscr ap
🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚🥐🥐🥐🥐🥐🥐
Thor:
come find me and fite me u skunk lovers I bet you can’t figure out who the snot I am
For Christmas I want avocados world peas. This does not, however, mean that I think they’re any good the demon hellspawn of politicians trying to work together against a “common enemy”. I’m going to let them rot under my bed until the young children start
soccer in the spring time. During the big games sdjdevnamxncvauerasdfjre
usjasdnzbvcjasdyr yes I am typing this with quill and parchment, why do you ask? I will throw them my running nose at the kids that are performing the best simply for my own amusement. I will be wearing a plack with a politically charged messaged about equal opportunities for the bad children to catch up to those with interest and talent at a subject closet racists..