GYSO Reviews Part 54 - An adventure in the Henry-verse

Published: 2024-12-01

Henry: But what do we do now?

Thim: Who cares?

Henry: But you can’t post to the blog if there’s no Internet connection to the GYSO Mansion??

Thim grabs. A phone materializes out of his pocket.

Thim: I’ll just use the portable hotspot thing on my phone.

Henry: But what about me? Can I be the wi-fi?

Thim: What the hell’s a ‘wiffy’?

Henry: UwU

Thim is scrolling frantically on his laptop, eyebrows shaved off in rage at the bullshit he’s reading on GYSO-eddit.

Thim: Can you believe what people are writing on here? It’s a completely seperate thing from the regular Internet?

Snag’darr: You mean, can I believe that people on the internet are posting hyperbolic things in order to get attention?

Thim: Hey, I do some weird shit, but I wouldn’t do that.

Snag’darr: Yesterday you ate an entire banana in one bite. You didn’t even peel it. You choked, of course, but that didn’t stop you from grabbing another one.

Thim: Okay, I don’t do that on the internet. I do that shit in the privacy of my own mansion that all my friends mysteriously live in for some insane reason. Like Albert!

Albert walks into the kitchen. He’s wearing a santa hat, cool sunglasses, and he is carrying some sort of radio surveillance equipment.

Albert: I GOT A NOSE OF A CONNECTION NODE THE HENRY-VERSE AND I HAVE COME TO SEIZE ALL TELECOMMUNCA–

Henry: That would be me! :D I’m the connection, node, and host!

Snag’darr: Would’ve figured as much, with it being called Henry-verse, and all.

Thim: Does anyone, anyone at all, want to give even the slightest bit of context for what the flying fucking lmao you’re talking about? Keep it to ten words or less, my attention span is fucked by reading GYSO-eddit today.

Snag’darr: Henry can act as a wi-fi adapter. And is also–

Thim: That’s ten words if you count ‘wiffy’ as a word, which I don’t, because it’s not a word.

Snag’darr: I hate you so much.

Albert is taking notes (on how to count) and speaks into a walkie-talkie.

Henry: There’s funny stuff on the Henry-verse :P

Albert is taking notes more frantically. The paper catches on fire in his hands from the friction, destroying his notes. He cries out in despair, collapsed on the ground like an eel–it’s real spooky shit guys trust me.

Henry: Like pictures!

Albert furiously speaks into his walkie-talkie and points at the aloe-vera plant, still writhing like an eel.

Albert: FSDAFSDAKLFJDOWEEIOUPRP

Thim: JESUS WHAT THE FUCK DON’T DO THAT MAN

Popping his head through a previously-closed window…

Jesus ‘Big Erectus Babe’ Christ: Someone call?

Thim: That’s the end of the post. Though there’s more stuff I wanted to do on the Henry-verse.

Snag’darr: You’re still writing that old thing?

A panda is trying to crawl out of Thim’s laptop screen. Thim smacks it with a broom and it recedes back into the black void on his computer screen.

Thim: Yeah, I’m strapped for time, so I just wrote what silly shit happened today.

Bunny: Father, connect me to wiffy.

Thim: What do you mean connect you to the wi-fi?

Snag’darr: Please, never speak again, Thim. Please.

Thim: Hey maybe it would take you off my back for a while.

Thim grabs some electrical equipment from the basement…

The dies.

The end.